I have begun reading a blog by the people at Shepherd’s Press (publishers of Shepherding a Child’s Heart). They have have some good posts on dynamics and issues in parenting that we don’t often think about.
Here’s one I recently read on gospel driven schoolwork (they had a whole series on school work).
Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight. —Proverbs 3:5-6In the last post we looked at a request regarding motivation and children doing schoolwork.
I’d like to see you address the topic of motivation in schoolwork sometime on your blog. How do we use the Scriptures to instill in our kids a motivation to do their best in their studies? What form should discipline take for children who do not apply themselves the way they should?
I asked you to think about this topic and consider how you might answer the question raised by the commenter. Now that you have had time to do that, let’s see what you think about my response.
This familiar proverb is often found on wall plaques. It is too often used as a Christian platitude, without any particular application. But it is specifically designed (as one of many applications) to help motivate your child to honor God with his schoolwork. The first couplet contrasts trusting God with relying on one’s own understanding of life. The second couplet gives a directive and a blessing.
What is there about schoolwork that should point to trust in God? First and foremost, it is God who assigned the schoolwork. God orders all things and determines all earthly authorities, including teachers (Colossians 1:15-20; Romans 8:28). Schoolwork, no matter how random, tedious or difficult it might be, is ultimately directed by God in his wise providence. One of the purposes of all the work that we have to do is to drive us to Christ and his gospel (Col. 3:17). In order to encourage your children to trust God, you must first encourage them with the gospel message of grace. Their schoolwork is sent to them by God. Therefore, schoolwork becomes an opportunity to call your children to faith in Christ.
So, when your children are unmotivated to do schoolwork, your first step is to encourage them to trust God. He didn’t make a mistake. He actually ordained that they would have this work to do at this time. Encourage your children to trust God’s wisdom in providing their work for them. In doing so, you are encouraging them not to trust their own understanding. Most children fall into the ratherbe camp. That is, I would rather be – making snowballs, playing ball, playing Wii games, etc. This is where they are to trust God and not their own understanding.
Does this mean your children will never have an unreasonable teacher who consistently gives unrealistic assignments? No, of course not. But that is where you function as a parent to protect—not coddle, but protect them—from this sort of thing. It is your responsibility as a parent to work out a solution; it is not an option for your child to rebel against authority.
Verse six complements the truth in the first couplet. Bruce Waltke, in his excellent commentary on this verse (The Book of Proverbs: Chapters 1-15 [NICOT], Eerdmans), shows that the word acknowledge here means much more than just a tip of the hat to God. The word has the same root as the other OT passages that talk about knowing God intimately. This verse is urging God’s people to show love for him in all they do. If God is acknowledged with this sort of conscious devotion, God then promises to make their paths straight.
Now, back to the child struggling with schoolwork. God has not made a mistake in giving the assignment, even if the human teacher did! Encourage your child not to rely on his own feelings and understanding, but to actively trust God’s wisdom. The ultimate reality is that your child’s assignments are from God. (Colossians 3:23 teaches that this is true for all tasks, not just schoolwork.) Therefore, this is a matter of obedience to God—schoolwork is not primarily about getting grades or pleasing teachers and parents. Schoolwork is about bringing honor to God.
You might be saying by now that your child is not particularly interested in honoring God in schoolwork. Well, that’s the fundamental problem, isn’t it? Of course it’s not natural to want to please and honor God. That’s true for all of us. Children may want to work for a good grade or some reward or recognition—that’s natural, and we are usually quite satisfied with that, because the homework gets finished and our own task is much easier. But not all children are motivated by those desires. What do you say then? Doing work for God’s honor seems pretty intangible.
Parent, be thankful for the opportunity to address your child’s difficulty. What is needed is the gospel. And when are people most drawn to the gospel? Isn’t it when they are most discouraged by their failure, weakness, and need? Help your children to be see the desires that drag their attention away from obedience. Remind them of the gospel and of God’s grace, which is available to help them whenever they need it.
As a parent you are commanded by God to teach your children to acknowledge and love God in every area of their lives (Deuteronomy 6:4-7; Ephesians 6:4, etc.). Schoolwork assignments are opportunities to show just how intimately God is involved in the life of your children. These assignments were handpicked by God especially for your child so that he would look to Christ for the strength and wisdom to accomplish the task (Philippians 4:13). Even if your child does not understand this, it is still your obligation as a parent to help him see it this way. This is reality.
If you teach discipline and hard work as the primary means to accomplishing schoolwork you will give your children a faulty picture of how life works. Your children need Christ to do their work in a way that honors God. They need Christ, and they need to see that their work has been given to them by God so that they will come to trust him for the strength to do their work. True biblical discipline flows from seeing the need for Christ’s grace in all of life.
This addresses the principles of the motivation issue raised in the original question. In the next post we will look at some practical ways to present these issues to children to encourage them with the gospel. Then we will take a look at appropriate discipline and correction in light of the biblical, gospel driven purpose of schoolwork.
In this light I strongly recommend Instructing a Child’s Heart. This book addresses the formative, foundational perspectives needed to help you and your children know God more deeply in all of life.